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Forest Jokes

Last updated : 29 May 2002 By Notts County Mad

Nothing like a few jokes to get the neighbours going!!!
Last year, my aged Great Aunt, who is more than a bit senile, gave me a Nottingham Forest season ticket for Christmas. Not wanting it, I took it down to the City Ground, and nailed it to the gates. A couple of weeks later, I had a change of heart, and decided that it was stupid to give something as valuable as that to any old stranger, so I went to retrieve the prized item. When I returned however it was too late. Some creep had nicked the nail.

One Forest fan says to his mate, 'What would you do if you won the lottery?'

'Easy! I'd buy a controlling interest in Forest" says the mate.

'Yeah, but what if you got FOUR numbers up?'

A Notts County fan moves from the city to a tiny village near Nottingham. This big, fat slobbering, Forestfan drives up to him in his truck and says "Oi mate! You're new in town ain't ya?""Yes I am" replies the County fan.

"Well, ta welcome ya to our little village, I'm gonna invite ya ta this big party I'm throwin tanight.There's gonna be loadsa drinkin. There's gonna be loadsa dancin, loadsa fightin an especially loadsa sex."

"Thanks that sounds great" says the County fan, getting quite excited "What should I wear?""Don't matter, it's just gonna be me, an you".


What do Division One and Brazil have in common? There'll soon be no Forest
A little boy goes to court because his parents beat him. The judge asks the little boy,"Well son would you like to live with your mother?" So the boy replies "No, my mum beats me!" So the judge says "Well,son,would you like to live with your Dad ?" so the little boy replies "No, my Dad beats me!" So the judge all out of ideas asks the little boy "well son, Where do you want to live then?"So the boy replies "I want to live in Nottingham Forest" So the judge is really puzzled and asks,"Well, why Nottingham Forest?" So the boy replies "Well Mr judge, Nottingham Forest ,they don't beat anyone..."
Paul Hart was caught speeding on his way to the City Ground today.
"I'll do anything for 3 points", he said when questioned.


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