It all started so well, the drive up to Christie Park flew by and we spent a couple of hours in the excellent York Hotel before the match chatting away (and being preached to and borderline harrassed, by a UKIP representative no less!) and watching Dave Nugent live up to my prediction of "he's gonna score, that boy" by leading Burnley to a win over Sunderland in the entertaining TV game. At quarter to two we strolled down and into the away end, hoping for a performance on the same kind of level as last week's demolition of Northampton Town. We didn't get it.
The only change was Campbell in for Edwards, but immediately the big man looked like someone who'd decided he was fit to play, when he wasn't even fit to run for the bus. Paul Mullin was slotted through as he strolled in behind the static defence, but thankfully Kasper Schmeichel stood tall to deny Mullin when it seemed certain he was going to slot the ball into the net. We just assumed this was an early blip, but it wasn't the case as the Shrimps began to knock the ball about with Notts penned back in their own half, seemingly unwilling to attempt anything resembling an attack. Johnnie Jackson was the next to nearly be at fault for a goal, attempting some kind of bizarre piece of skill on the edge of his own box to allow Phil Jevons to nick the ball and look up to find himself stunned to be baring down a goal. Schmeichel once again came to the rescue however throwing himself at Jevons' feet and smuggling the ball away to safety. Morecambe vs. Schmeichel was to become the common theme of the first hour of the match.
The Magpies did venture vaguely forward after this and forced the first save out of ex-Forest 'keeper Barry Roche in the Morecambe goal. The ball bounced kindly for Ben Davies, the Magpies' best player on the day by some distance, who's dipping volley was tipped over the bar by the acrobatic Roche. The resulting corner was easily cleared and the Shrimps were back in the ascendency. A corner wasn't dealt with at all by the Notts defence and the ball was scrambled goalwards by the Shrimps but trickled just wide, before Phil Jevons came as close as anyone had thus far after seventeen minutes. Garry Hunter did well going forward and whipped in a cross which Jevons managed to hook goalwards, but with Schmeichel well beaten, the ball cannoned off the angle of post and bar and was cleared by the Magpies after another goalmouth scramble. To say our goal was now living a charmed life was an understatement, Morecambe deserve to be 3-0 up already.
The battering showed no signs of relenting with Stewart Drummond and Ian Craney opening up space for Jevons, but his deep cross was inches away from being converted by Garry Hunter. Hunter had another effort soon after, picking up the ball and scuffing a shot goalwards which took a deflection and had to be tipped round the post by Schmeichel at full stretch. Notts finally got back up the other end of the pitch, however briefly, and Ben Davies' free-kick was headed miles over the bar by Lee Hughes. That i'm mentioning this as one of the moments of the half for Notts really does some up just how painful to watch the first forty five minutes were. Back to the Morecambe chances anyway, and Jevons had another go on the half hour, turning Campbell and Thompson inside out before firing a shot that was well held by Schmeichel, who was now getting pretty annoyed by the fact he was being used as target practice for the Morecambe forwards.
The Shrimps had a decent penalty appeal turned down as Jevons appeared to be brought down by Brendan Moloney in the box, but the Morecambe striker just ran into the Notts defender as much as anything before throwing himself to the ground. It mattered little though as, when Notts managed to scramble the ball away from the corner, the hosts managed to get the most deserved half time lead in the history of football. Ian Craney swung in a deep corner which Shrimps captain Jim Bentley got his head to ahead of Lee Hughes to guide past the stranded Schmeichel and into the net. Christie Park celebrated, with Sammy McIlroy encroaching onto the pitch before realising he looked a bit of a fool and retreated back to his dugout. Schmeichel shouted at the Notts players who just kind of shrugged and blamed each other before sauntering back to take kick-off. Matt Ritchie went on a solo run and fired a right footed shot just wide and Morecambe had an even more obvious dive laughed at by the referee before the half-time whistle blew, with Sol Campbell looking rather confused by the chorus of boos that rang down from the away end.
The second half started with a novel happening, a Notts half chance. Lee Hughes latched onto a long ball over the top and got away from Danny Adams, before firing a low shot which Barry Roche managed to grab at the second attempt. Morecambe were soon back in the ascendency though and a deep cross from Hunter was accidentally put out for a corner by Brendan Moloney. This spelled disaster as Notts once again failed to deal with a set piece ball in. Craney fired this one into the near post at a ferocious pace and tall, bald, ugly and very League Two striker Paul Mullin glanced a header into the roof of the net to send Christie Park wild once again. Bar the Notts fans, who'd now lost interest in the match and were discussing just who the new manager should be.
Morecambe once again bounded forward after the restart and Ian Craney went on a darting run which was halted by Brendan Moloney, who just hauled the on loan Huddersfield man to the ground. Another Terriers loanee, Phil Jevons, struck the free-kick which was flying towards the goal until it deflected away off the wall and for a corner. Notts managed to clear this one, whilst Sol Campbell clattered into a two-footed challenge with Shrimps' midfielder Manny Panther and was lucky to get away without a red card, let alone a yellow one. Panther was carried off soon after and replaced by Craig Stanley for the hosts, whilst Luke Rodgers was brought on for the amazingly quiet Karl Hawley for Notts.
Notts showed some initiative in winning a couple of corners and creating an opening for Rodgers, who headed over from six yards but was judged to be offside anyway. Rodgers seemed to have given Notts some sort of momentum and his run saw him ghost past two challengers before he fired a shot from the edge of the box straight at Barry Roche. Jim Bentley was booked for clattering the next Notts sub, Craig Westcarr, and from the resulting free-kick Notts got themselves back into the game, completely undeservedly. Jamie Clapham clipped the ball forward and it was cleared as far as Ben Davies, who controlled the ball, seemingly with his hand, spun and fired a left footed shot past Roche and into the net from the edge of the box. It should've been a consollation goal, but it actually gave Notts a real chance of getting something out of the game.
Notts began to surge forward and Craig Westcarr whipped in a teasing cross from the right which was headed against the post by Johnnie Jackson, while Lee Hughes' follow up shot squirmed across the face of goal. Michael Twiss came on for the excellent Jevons to waste a bit of time for Morecambe, who had ten minutes to hold on for their first win of the season. Lee Hughes pulled the ball across for Luke Rodgers who was inches away from turning in the leveller, whilst Ben Davies' brilliant far post cross just needed a touch to send the Notts fans wild. Wayne Curtis came on for the injured Laurence Wilson for the hosts, who tried in vain to stop Notts streaming forward. Rodgers was felled just on the edge of the box, with the Notts players arguing that the linesman had flagged when Rodgers had entered the area. Davies clipped in the free kick but the colossal Bentley rose to clear the ball away. Ian Craney came close with a snap shot on the break for the hosts, whilst Schmeichel's goal kick forward was too long for anyone to get on the end of but nearly forced Barry Roche into a save!
Four minutes of added time were shown and Notts had their big chance to snatch an undeserved point. The ball pinged around the box and fell to Craig Westcarr, who fired a low shot at goal which cannoned off the inside of the far post and rolled along the line before somehow being pounced on by Barry Roche. No one was quite sure how it stayed out, but in truth Morecambe deserved that little slice of luck after giving the Magpies a good going over for 70 minutes. The moment of the match and possibly the season nearly came with the last kick, Kasper Schmeichel jogging forward for a corner and connecting sweetly with an overhead kick that flashed inches over Roche's crossbar, it would've been one of those unbelievable moments that football has a habit of throwing up. As it was, Morecambe held on for a thoroughly deserved first win of the season and Notts trudged off to reflect on a performance which was devoid of commitment, passion, ability and just about anything positive. The main topic of discussion was whether Ian McParland could stay after such a shambolic outing, with the main answer to this question being "no". The match was reminiscent of disasters like Rushden & Diamonds away and Bury at home that saw Gary Mills and Steve Thompson lose their jobs, only Morecambe weren't as clinical infront of goal. This time we had an expensive side out there on the pitch, with one player being paid more than the whole Morecambe side. To show such a lack of effort is simply inexcusable.
We trudged off to have a look at Morecambe seafront and have our pictures taken with Eric Morecambe. My dad suggested that a weekend here might've been a good idea, i'm glad we passed that one up. Of all the places i've visited with this club Morecambe is just about the most grim. The journey home wasn't quite as speedy as the one there, with spirits low and me trying to work out just how we'd performed so badly against an average side. It all comes down to not being up for the battle against a side who wanted it, and that is even more disappointing than the hopeless performances of the past few seasons.
Notts Co - Schmeichel, Moloney, Thompson, Campbell, Clapham, Davies, Bishop, Jackson, Ritchie (Westcarr), Hughes, Hawley (Rodgers)
Morecambe 2 - (Bentley '36, Mullin '52)
Notts County 1 - (Davies '70)
Attendance - 3,335 (792 away)